


DC Playlists, Meta, Headcanons, & Plotbunnies

by The_Mouse_of_Anon



Category: DCU, Young Justice (Cartoon)
Genre: Meta, Multi, basically whatever I feel isn't extensive enough to deserve its own separate listing, chapters prone to shifting around as I organize them, character and relationship tags prone to increasing as I add things from tumblr, headcanons, playlists
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-18
Updated: 2019-08-21
Packaged: 2020-09-06 11:29:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 18
Words: 7,701
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20290729
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Mouse_of_Anon/pseuds/The_Mouse_of_Anon
Summary: Just a collection of my random DC-centric playlists, meta, headcanons, and so on from tumblr that I feel aren't extensive enough to warrant their own separate listing. (Yes some of these might be drabbles.)





	1. A Bluepulse OT3 Ramble

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 5 January 2014

## My Bluepulse ramble that I thought deserved its own post

\-----------------------------------------------------

> avenk:  
I sooo want a cute ff where Bart interacts with the Scarab … them having an actual conversation (even though Jaime has to tell everything Khaji Da says). They become friends too and Bart starts to greet both Jaime and Khaji Da when they see each other. It feels nice for Khaji Da because Jaime is no longer his only friend and person he can speak to.
> 
> Oh and Bart likes to pat Khaji Da and gently vibrate his hand. Khaji enjoys that.
> 
> And I imagine it being really amusing when all three of them are having a heated discussion about a silly topic. xD 
> 
> <strike>Khaji Da x Jaime x Bart is my OT3</strike>

\-----------------------------------------------------

_Khaji Da, you might be too protective_

This ramble of mine was inspired from this initial post, and I like what I came up with so much that I figured it deserved its own post so it would be easier to find.

I can totally see that happening. ‘Course things would probably be simplified if Jaime and Khaji Da ever figured out a way to switch control back and forth… which would probably be downright weird to anyone else. Bart would like it though. (Khaji Da/Jaime/Bart is definitely my OT3.) I can just imagine something like this-

Bart: It’s so totally crash! I mean, come on, you two- me- on a beach out in the sun, surf, and-

Khaji Da: _Negative. That is a bad idea._

Jaime: Khaji Da thinks that’s a bad idea.

Bart: What? Why? I thought it was a good idea. You know, just the three of us… alone…

Khaji Da: _Negative. A shoreline is unlikely to be sparsely populated. Also, aquatic movement would likely require Jaime to be without a shirt. This is unacceptable._

Jaime: Uh… _Ese_, _mi corazon_, Khaji Da says that beaches are a bad idea because I’d probably have to be shirtless.

Bart: *roll eyes* Do you two _honestly_ think I’d suggest it if I didn’t have a secluded beach in mind?

Khaji Da: _…Possibly. You are… ‘Impulsive’._

Jaime: …I’m not saying that.

Bart: Not saying what?

Jaime: No.

Bart: What? C’mon! Tell me! Wha’d Khaji say? C’mooooon! Tellmetellmetellme-

Khaji Da: *switches control with Jaime* You are impulsive. We are not going to a beach.

Bart: Awwww… Why not? I thought it was a good idea!

Khaji Da: …There may be crabs. Or sand fleas. Infestation is unacceptable.

Bart: …*pout* You just don’t want even the slightest chance that anybody but you or me could see Jaime’s hot bod.

Khaji Da: …Affirmative. *switches control back to Jaime*

Jaime: *facepalm* You two are _impossible._


	2. Khaji Da is weirdly protective of Jaime

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a random headcanon that still amuses me. 18 April 2016

Khaji Da is weirdly protective of Jaime. Granted, it’s to be expected what with Khaji Da being fused to Jaime’s spine, but it extends to the point of ridiculousness.

[Do not eat that Jaime Reyes.]  
“It’s just Cheetos. What’s the problem?”  
[There is nothing in nature that resembles that. It contains carcinogens that will cause cancer.]  
“…Somehow I don’t think I’m going to get _cancer_ from _cheetos_ ese.”

Or even

“…Did you replace my tooth?”  
[Affirmative.]  
“How? Why?”  
[Normal systems maintenance. You lost the tooth in combat. Losing a tooth and being unable to replace it would compromise your identity. That is unacceptable. Nothing less than peak efficiency is acceptable.]  
“…So, what? You’re just going to try to maintain my body at physically twenty or so when I hit that point and just try to make me immortal?”  
[….]  
“Khaji Da?”  
[This possibility needs to be examined further.]  
“Dios mio! I just gave you an idea! No, no way, no how. You are NOT keeping me alive past the end of the world!”  
[I do not know if that is even possible.]  
“…But you would if you knew you could.”  
[AFFIRMATIVE.]


	3. Bluepulse OT3: Khaji Da has a preference of which partner he's fused to

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 20 April 2016

## Bluepulse OT3 headcanon

While Khaji Da is absolutely smitten with both Jaime and Bart, Khaji Da would never want to be fused with Bart because of his 5,000-mile-a-minute thought process. That and Khaji Da secretly (not so secretly to Jaime) fears that if he was fused with Bart his amusement at Bart’s hyperactivity would shift to annoyance and resentment.


	4. Bluepulse OT3: Bart and Khaji Da being attracted to each other makes sense

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 28 April 2016

## Another Bluepulse OT3 headcanon

Jaime being with Bart or Khaji Da isn’t hard for most people to understand (considering the fact that Jaime can get along with almost anyone). What confuses others is the draw between Bart and Khaji Da.

What most people don’t know, but Jaime knows all too well, is that Bart and Khaji Da have a very similar morbid sense of humor.

\-----------------------------------------------

“Oh, you know what’s hilarious to do in this game? Hit the enemy with a grenade at point-blank range. It’s hilarious the way they explode– all these random unrealistic purple and red gobs, like exploding jello.”

[_Jaime Reyes, we must do this! I want to see this! It is imperative!_]

“…You’re both twisted.”


	5. Impulse-centric bluepulse rambling

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one's more of a drabble-ish-thing from all the way back to 25 April 2016. Enjoy.

When Bart first realized that he was attracted to Jaime, he probably wanted to slap himself because ‘checking out the enemy’ was totally _not_ the reason he went into the past.

When Bart first realized that he was falling for Jaime he probably wanted to start banging his head against a wall because, sure, the guy was hot and all and he can definitely appreciate the fact that Jaime is attractive, and yeah it isn’t like Bart didn’t have it in mind to work as hard as he could to keep Jaime from going on mode, but _falling_ for the person who in the future/Bart’s-original era was _the enemy_ was so _NOT_ the reason why he went to the past in the first place.

When Bart realized Jaime was caught by the Reach he probably felt like he’d been punched in the gut, like his entire world got yanked out from under his feet as he realized just how much Jaime meant to him.

When Bart rescued Jaime and told him why he came back in time he probably wanted to kick himself repeatedly for feeling upset about the idea that Jaime would never be attracted to him (because, again, so _not_ the reason he went to the past). And why would he when he had to worry about becoming the instigator for the world being enslaved?

When Bart realized Jaime was on mode he probably wanted to scream and rip his own hair out because he probably partially blamed himself for having been too caught up in trying desperately not to fall in love with Jaime that he didn’t do what he felt he should have in order to keep Jaime from going on mode.

When Bart saw Jaime off mode again he probably wanted so bad to glomp on to him and never let go, but held back because 1) he thought it’d make Jaime feel a little weird, and 2) Jaime walked right past him like he didn’t see him to thank Zatanna for freeing him. Bart probably felt, again, that he had no chance and tried to remind himself that that wasn’t why he’d gone into the past.

When Bart’s flirting was clearly encouraged for the first time by Jaime, Bart probably didn’t know what to do.

When Bart’s flirting became more blatant and Jaime didn’t tell him to back off, Bart probably started to think there was hope.

When Bart’s flirting was returned by Jaime for the first time, Bart probably thought he was going to faint from happiness– because while that so was not the reason he went to the past, if Jaime was interested he wasn’t going to complain.

When Bart started going out with Jaime he probably hadn’t been so happy in his life. The Garricks, Barry, and Wally probably had to remind him to eat from time to time due to his being in a ridiculously happy love-struck daze.

When Bart was kissed by Jaime for the first time he probably did almost faint.

<strike> _(Continue below for it to go from just flat bluepulse to bluepulse OT3.)_ </strike>

When Bart and Jaime started getting closer is probably when the wariness started creeping back in, because the closer Bart got to Jaime the more aware of the scarab’s independent intelligence he became.

When Jaime told Bart Khaji Da’s name, Bart probably felt conflicted. On one hand there was his past/a-future-that-hadn’t-come-to-be (which said that anything Reach was _the enemy_), and on the other hand there was the scarab– who Jaime _trusted_– with a name, Khaji Da, who apparently hated the Reach as much as he did.

When Bart started relaxing about Khaji Da, he probably wondered if he’d lost his mind and if it was safe to trust him (even if he trusted Jaime to keep Khaji Da in check).

When Bart spoke to Khaji Da for the first time it was probably awkward, but it was probably to thank him for keeping a watch on Jaime and keeping him alive.

When Bart spoke _with_ Khaji Da for the first time he probably felt like his heart stopped for a second– and then he started to understand why Jaime was so fond of him.

When Bart started finding Khaji Da attractive (associating Jaime’s armored form with Khaji Da), Bart probably wanted to bang his head against a wall again.

When Bart started flirting at Khaji Da, Jaime was probably baffled at first and then amused at Khaji Da’s confusion.

When Bart flirted at Khaji Da only to get an annoyed/fond response for the first time, he probably had the thought “Did that just happen? Did Khaji Da just encourage me?”

When Bart was cuddled up to Jaime and looked into his eyes only to see one brown and the other gold for the first time, he probably felt ridiculously happy at realizing that Khaji Da was just as present in the cuddling as Jaime was and _both_ of them were looking at him.

When Bart found out that Khaji Da was interested in being in the relationship as much as he and Jaime were, Bart probably couldn’t believe his luck (and how thoroughly insane things had turned out from the perspective of why he’d first gone to the past).

When Bart kissed Khaji Da (via his and Jaime’s armored-form) for the first time he probably never expected to be kissed back.

When they were curled up together (knowing that all three of them were involved and present) for the first time, Bart and Jaime both probably never expected Khaji Da to switch out control with Jaime, extending some of the armor around Jaime and hugging Bart close, to contentedly say, “Mine.”


	6. Random Tsriik'k-miihksh Scene

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the first mini-scene I wrote with my sassy hiveless reachling OC, way back on 12 May 2016. Chances are this tidbit (and the others with Tsriik'k-miihksh AKA Tserii) will wind up in a longer fic I have planned. For now this is just a little preview of things I have planned.

Khaji Da’s warning shriek of [_REACH!_] tore through Jaime’s mind, causing him to whip around with a sonic-cannon forming from his right arm almost faster than he could think.

The skittering, clicking squawk that elicited from the disguised reachling as they ducked, a squawk that Khaji Da had instantly translated, made Jaime freeze. Reach this person clearly was, but no reachling Jaime or Khaji Da ever met would have responded with, “Are you out of your _mind?!_”

Jaime powered down the sonic-cannon and let Khaji Da take over speaking. In Reach-speak they asked, “What _are_ you? What are you doing here?”

Seeing that Jaime wasn’t going to kill them, the reachling brushed themself off and cautiously stood while keeping a wary eye on him. “Trying to not get my face shot off for one,” was the clipped reply before they added, “I would have said by hive-sucking Reach, but considering the fact that I’m not a bloody smear on the ground I think I can rule out that assumption.”

Jaime blinked. Reach normally didn’t have a random blobby black spot covering probably a quarter of their face. And the way the reachling spoke… Jaime could only say in confusion, “What…?”

“You’re an infiltrator, but you obviously don’t work for them or you would have killed me. I’m Reach, but I obviously don’t work for them or you would have been swarmed by now. We are both _of_ the Reach, but neither of us work _for_ them.”

Jaime was confused. _‘Is this normal Reach behavior ese? Because it doesn’t seem like it.’_

Khaji Da didn’t even hesitate. [_Negative. And you know about as much as I do._]

Turning his attention back to the reachling Jaime asked, “Why are you… different?”

The reachling quirked an eyebrow ridge and answered, “You’ve never heard of the ‘hiveless’ before, have you?”


	7. Random Tsriik'k-miihksh Scene II

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another out-of-context scene with Tserii. 25 May 2016  
(And Tserii's aliases vary: Tsriik'k-miihksh, Tsriik'k, Tserii, Tseri, Tsrii, etc. Tserii or Tsriik'k are among the most common.)

“Uh… So you don’t talk to too many people, do you?” Jaime asked.

The Reachling gave a sound akin to a snort (although how that was possible without a nose Jaime had no clue). “With this face?” they scoffed, “When was the last time you heard of anyone being recognized as remotely connected to the Reach without being attacked?”

“…Good point.” Jaime let his gaze drop to the rough table. After a moment or two of listening to Tseri rattle things around to make something that might as well have been tea, Jaime cautiously looked up. “Can I ask a question?”

“Go ahead.”

“If you had met the Reach Ambassador, the one that tried to invade my world, what would you have done?”

Tseri glanced back at Jaime with a wicked smirk; it was an expression almost entirely foreign to anything Jaime or Khaji Da had experienced of the Reach. The spotted Reachling’s tone made their differences from the majority of their species all the more blatant. “Simple,” they answered, a vindictive glee laced through their words, “I would have wrecked his face.”


	8. Random Tsriik'k-miihksh Scene III

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tserii yet again. 14 July 2016

“You are more than welcome to stop staring at me like I just killed your parent,” the reachling directed at the Green Lantern.

“But you… ah… you’re… Reach?” the Lantern asked uncertainly.

Tserii waved the Lantern’s confusion aside as if they were talking about some minor annoyance. “Yes, and water is wet. If we are done talking about the obvious, I have a… ‘friend’ in need of transport back to his home world.”

“What.”

Tserii glanced back over their shoulder to call their guest into the room. “Jaime? If you’d come here?”

Jaime, in full Blue Beetle armor, ducked into the room from Tserii’s makeshift kitchen. “I didn’t expect you to get in touch with someone so quickly,” he stated honestly, trying not to pay too much attention to the Green Lantern’s surprised stare.

Turning back to the Lantern Tserii said, “This is Jaime. One of yours– a ‘John Stewart’ I believe it was?” At Jaime’s nod they continued. “–will be able to vouch for him.”

“…You…. want us… to transport him… to wherever it is he wants to go. And you’re Reach. _Why_ would I trust you?”

Tserii rolled their eyes. “One, you were put in touch with me by Ki’aal. Two, if you know Ki’aal then clearly you know how hard it is to earn his trust. Three, do you _honestly think_ that _Ki’aal_ of all people would sign you up to walk into a Reach trap in a place where you and yours could be swarming like carrion bugs on a carcass before any Reach vessel could approach a reasonable distance? Oh yes, and I reiterate: one of _yours_ can vouch for him. Any other ridiculous questions? Or should I continue to point out the obvious?”

The Lantern blinked before asking Jaime, “The bug always like this?”

“So far as I can tell? Yes,” Jaime admitted.


	9. Bluepulse OT3: Bart and gendered clothing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one was inspired actually by an art piece a mutual of mine on tumblr did at the time. Unfortunately they've either since deactivated or changed their url, so I have no idea where to find the art piece now. 4 June 2016

## Headcanon: Bart and gendered clothing

Bart doesn’t get the concept of gendered clothing. The idea that guys ‘shouldn’t’ be allowed to wear skirts or what have you just makes NO sense to him. He likes skirts, especially if they’re really flowy, and he knows he looks good in just about anything he wants to wear.

Jaime’s at a loss because on one hand he thinks Bart in a dress is actually kind of cute, but on the other hand he worries about horrible people trying to treat Bart like crap when he’s dressed ‘like a girl’. Khaji Da just thinks Bart is gorgeous as hell and thinks Jaime needs to stop worrying what other people will think and just enjoy the view.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And because I think my tags for this one (especially the last one) are worth including:
> 
> #bluepulse OT3 #bluepulse #Bart Allen #Jaime Reyes #Khaji Da #@tammyha-art #Saw that art piece and immediately thought of Khaji Da insisting that Bart's pretty


	10. Sometimes Khaji Da Asks Jaime Really Weird Shit

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The first example of why a sleep-deprived scarab is a bad idea. 11 July 2016

## Blue Beetle Headcanon: Sometimes Khaji Da Asks Jaime Really Weird Shit

As a superhero sometimes Jaime keeps really weird hours. Sometimes so weird that Khaji Da is all that is keeping him awake in school or with whatever he’s doing.

Thing is sometimes it’s Khaji Da’s fault that he’s keeping such weird hours in the first place. Jaime can always tell when Khaji Da is thinking really hard about something (Khaji Da does this thing where he fires off electrical pulses which makes it feel like he’s drumming his ‘legs’ against Jaime’s back around his spine), so he can usually tell when Khaji Da is going to ask him about something.

Sometimes Khaji Da’s questions are random as hell, or downright weird– especially if he’s been awake too long. Such as:

  * “What is the purpose of blogging?”
  * “What does the term ‘shit post’ mean? This does not make sense.”
  * “I am confused about why there seems to be disapproval for polyamory. Is that not the sort of relationship we are in with the Bart Allen?”
  * “Why do people share things they find embarrassing for public consumption online?”
  * “What is the purpose behind having 50 sports channels?”
  * “What is a ‘ship war’? I thought I understood this term, but I think I do not based off of what I have found.”
  * “I have done the math and considered all probabilities. I would like to ask the Bart Allen how it is physically possible for him to eat 5 pounds of food per day. Probable volume dimensions of his stomach indicate this should be an impossibility.”
  * “Query: is it possible that some branch of dinosaurs may be currently alive, and what is the estimated probability that if encountered they would try to consume us?”
  * “I have been studying weapons-designs online. I have compiled a list. How many of these would you deem acceptable?”
  * “If dragons were real would it actually be accurate to state that they are giant scaly fire-breathing cats with wings?”
  * “After careful consideration I have come to the conclusion that having back-up organs is a viable way to ensure against lethal damage. Would this be acceptable?”
  * “Why does cheese not obey the laws of permeability?”
  * “Is ‘supercalifragilisticexpialodocious’ an actual word, and if so what is its use?”

(Sometimes Jaime is so much at a loss for how to answer that he just has to switch out control with Khaji Da so Khaji Da can ask Bart instead. Bart might not know the answers to a lot of Khaji Da’s random questions, but he can usually derail Khaji Da if he has to, or convince the scarab to _finally_ go to sleep.)


	11. Future League (Tim, Eddie, Kon, Bluepulse OT3)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In which Tim is long-suffering, Eddie has developed a habit of jumping out at people for pranks, and everyone who's part of Tim's team make other members of the League wonder about their collective sanity. 26 July 2016

When the heroes of Tim and Jaime’s generation get older and become primary League members and heroes, a lot of odd things are prone to happening.

A lot of it has to do with the fact that the heroes of the second generation of the League, those who started out as sidekicks and the like to the first generation of League members, have become almost like family– complete with picking on each other, occasional pranks, and routinely hanging out (even if it is only in League spaces to protect their secret identities).

Jaime, Khaji Da, and Bart are no exception to this. They have their banter and pranks back and forth like any of the other 2nd-generation legacy-Leaguers.

This confuses _the hell_ out of any newer non-legacy heroes.

Examples include:

**1) The Glitter Skeleton in the Closet:**

“Oh don’t open that closet.”  
“What? Why?”  
“Khaji Da saw someone stash a skeleton and a bucket of glitter in there.”  
“…And you didn’t?”  
“Nope.”  
“_How_? He’s fused to your spine!”  
“I was asleep _ese_.”

**2) The Boas in the Kitchen:**

“Alright, I’m gonna take off for a moment and get something to eat. If the lights flicker don’t pay it any mind.”  
“…Bart… Why would the lights flicker?”  
“Why would I know? I’m not Static. I’m not the one who knows how electrical flow wor– yeah, nobody’s gonna buy that. Right. Future boy. Let’s just say I’m not doing anything but clearing out the Watchtower fridges, okay?”  
“What– _No_! Bart! Hey Bart! Damn it, I am not agreeing to this! I am not being your cover for– _WHY IS THE KITCHEN COVERED IN FEATHER BOAS?!_”

**3) The ‘Haunted’ Watchtower:**

A random scream in the Watchtower.  
“What was _that_?!”  
“I don’t know. Think we’re haunted?”  
“Oh ha ha Blue. Very funny. You know who did that?”  
“…”  
“Well?”  
“Nope. Nada. No idea.”  
“Why don’t I believe-”  
Another scream, then over the communicator, “Blue! I got him! I got him!”  
“RUN! Run for your life Eddie!”  
As Jaime runs off and maniacal cackles echo from the direction of the screams, “…What did I just witness?”

**4) Plausible Deniability:**

“…And Khaji Da said that there was some weird sensor ghost or something-”  
“No I did not. It must have been Jaime.”  
“Oh. Okay. Anyway, so Jaime said-”  
“I don’t think it was Jaime. Khaji Da’s the one with the very specific word-choices.”  
“Tim. You think Jaime is incapable of knowing how to speak like me when he wishes?”  
“No, but the two of you each have subtle tells. And you need to stop traumatizing the rookies.”  
“…Wait, I’m confused… Which one was I talking to?”  
“I would hardly say that it is traumatizing. And it forces others to learn to be more observant.”  
“Khaji Da, you’re confusing others again.”  
“He is fine.”  
“I’m confused.”  
“No Khaji Da, he is not fine. You’re trying to set up the poor guy to need therapy is what you’re doing.”  
“No, what Kon did with the skeleton and the glitter in the closet is enough to cause someone to need therapy.”  
“…You knew about that?”  
“…There is no proof.”  
Another random scream from a hallway.  
“DAMN IT EDDIE!”  
“Oh man _Kon_! You should have seen your face!”  
“…I’m still confused.”  
“Welcome to the League.”  
“We are not always this terrible.”  
“Khaji Da, stop helping.”


	12. Khaji Da, other scarabs, and sleep

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes there is reference to _Familia: Not Simple, but Needed_ in this one. 20 December 2016

## Headcanon: Khaji Da, other scarabs, and sleep

All of the scarabs are highly advanced AIs, so much so that they are people– no questions asked. As such, because they are so intelligent and adaptive to whatever circumstances they find themselves in, they require sleep (which gives them a chance to do repairs and clean up any errors that may have cropped up in their systems).

They don’t need anywhere near as much sleep as a human would– possibly three hours max to a human’s eight, and that every other night– but if they so desire they can match their hosts’ sleeping schedules. If they go without sleep for too long, that’s where things start getting weird. As with humans, it depends on the individual how quickly they start going off the the wall and how severe it is depending on amount of time without sleep. That aside, if a scarab goes a full month or more without sleep then they’re likely to experience hallucinations and extreme bouts of paranoia or mania. If they go without sleep for only a week or two then they might more accurately be described as ‘hyper’ depending on the individual.

###  **Khaji Da is no exception to this.**

Give him about four days or more without sleep and he starts doing really random or weird things. Examples include:

**1)** He has made really random off-the-wall comments– think things like the infamous [_Let’s paint his nails._] among other comments– which he eventually got comfortable with saying when he actually had enough sleep because they make Jaime laugh. Sometimes it’s overdramatic, sometimes it’s outright silly, and sometimes it’s as close to whining as he’s ever going to get; he almost always denies that he said any of it when he’s had enough sleep.

**2)** He has done research on things that under normal circumstances he would never consider investigating. This has led him to watching the entire Youtube series _Will It Blend?_ in full, spending at least two hours combing through peepresearch.org, and doing a thorough investigation of fictional weaponry and trying to determine what would be needed for said fictional weaponry to be remotely feasible. At one point he may or may not have tried to determine the science behind the wands in the Harry Potter books (something which he vehemently denies).

**3)** In extreme cases where he has gone without sleep for too long, he loses a certain amount of rationality and his curiosity gets the better of him. This has at times led him to experiment and actually try to build things without stopping to consider if he should or not– which has resulted in attempts to make weapons that don’t exist, trying to create some form of technology that might make it possible to coherently explain the science behind wormhole theory, various doomsday-machines-of-the-week (which more often than not don’t work as he expects them to because his mind is skipping around too much to be truly methodical), and– at least in one reality– creating a scarab with a fully-functioning AI independent of himself. At least one of his experiments had the unintended side-effect of melting their toaster.

**4)** There have been instances where he was in the middle of one of his experiments-born-out-of-sleep-deprivation and he was interrupted by someone (usually Bart) asking him what he was doing. This never fails to derail him and sometimes he completely forgets why he thought it was a good idea to work on whatever he was working on. In even worse cases it has led him to forget what he was even trying to create (because when he’s in this state he never takes notes of any form– mainly because he never needs to take notes when he’s had enough sleep).

**5)** While he is completely rational and recognizes the value of sleep when he has actually had as much as he needs, when he goes too long without sleep he’s prone to dismissing it as unnecessary (which only serves to make his complete lack of rationality or logic even worse the longer he goes without). Comments like [_Sleep is superfluous._] are not uncommon. As such, occasionally Jaime or Bart have to trick him or talk him into going to sleep. This has, at times, led to nonsensical arguments that more often than not Khaji Da refuses to acknowledge as having happened.

Long story short: a Khaji Da without enough sleep is _weird_.


	13. Devilfish: Eddie and Shark Movies

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A headcanon that I stand by and likely always will when it comes to Eddie and La'gaan. 31 january 2017

> druminor:
> 
> So there is a movie called Ghost Shark, and this is pretty much all you need to know about it.

Okay, because I am a GIANT nerd and I have seen this wonderful atrocity in all of its glory _and_ I am complete Devilfish trash, I’m going to say this:

**Eddie would expose La’gaan to this movie.** I made reference to the fact that Eddie would expose La’gaan to _Jaws_ (yes all of them) and to _Sharknado_ (all of them too) in some of my Devilfish fics, but I don’t know if I made it clear precisely how out of hand this would get.

Eddie is a movie-brat; he grew up on a movie studio lot and probably got home-schooled by his aunt and her various co-workers/employees. _He knows movies._ He could probably also rattle off a film list of B-movies at least half-a-mile long in 12 point font off the top of his head– a fair amount of them so obscure that most people haven’t heard of them.

So you can bet this movie-brat smartass would eventually decide to make it a running joke to expose his temperamental friend to as many B-movie shark films as possible– and it’d only get worse once he and La’gaan started going out. The first few times, like with the _Jaws_ films, Eddie would at least give some forewarning as to how horrendous the movie is going to be; but as time goes by eventually the warning would shrink to “It’s a shark movie,” and that’s the only hint poor La’gaan would get as to the complete nonsense hell that was about to occur onscreen.

And _Ghost Shark_ in particular? By about the third pure-_WTF?!_ death you can bet that Eddie would have pulled La’gaan into rating the deaths by how creative and/or ridiculous they were and the two of them would be shit-talking the movie _the entire way through_. (And La’gaan would be swearing up and down that death-by-ghost-shark-through-the-toilet is just _wrong_.)

And from there it would eventually expand to just about any ocean- or water-related films they could find, and it all too often just devolves into them mocking the movies or critiquing the absolutely _horrendous_ inaccuracies (and _NO_ La’gaan will _never_ get over the phallic palace in Little Mermaid or the absolutely painful attempts in some movies to have ‘mermaids’ making dolphin-like noises which he insists sound awkwardly vulgar), or even cheering on predators or monsters as they take out the protagonists.

From all of that the two of them would end up with in-jokes that make sense to almost no one but them, but which would never fail to make them crack up. Don’t even get them started on _Sharktopus_ and how completely wrong that was.

> druminor:  
But what about Waterworld? Because this headcanon would eventually have to lead to them watching Waterworld.

Absolutely! I agree with that one 110%. (Though small confession on my part: I’ve only seen bits and pieces of _Waterworld_.)

They’d also end up seeing _The Abyss_, _Finding Nemo_, probably _Shark Tale_, and they _definitely_ watched _Splash_. (I mentioned _Splash_ up in my original comment, but I couldn’t remember the title. XP)


	14. Devilfish: Sick La'gaan Headcanon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was sick at the time I wrote this one and was in Devilfish hell. So, Sick La'gaan. 4 February 2017

Because I’m sick and feeling lousy, I’m just going to project it all on my Devilfish feels. So:

When La’gaan is sick he’s got a bad habit of not behaving himself. He hates admitting when he’s sick and will try to stubborn-bullhead his way through. He’ll try to get up and keep busy even when ideally he should just take it easy and rest.

This was a habit that remained firmly in place until he got together with Eddie. Eddie almost never gets sick, so when he starts picking up on the signs that La’gaan’s sick he gets after him to take care of himself. When La’gaan doesn’t (because let’s face it he’s stubborn as hell), Eddie starts fussing over him and eventually resorts to sitting on him or wrapping himself around La’gaan so that La’gaan can’t easily get up and wander around.

It’s only when La’gaan finally resigns himself to the fact that he’s sick that Eddie eases up some. But thing is, when La’gaan finally stops fighting it and _admits_ that he’s sick, he becomes completely pathetic and will carry on like he’s slowly dying. Eddie is there to support him through all of it, but he has a hard time not laughing at how ridiculous La’gaan is being. (And if he does laugh La’gaan makes it worse by pouting at him– because no one can take La’gaan pouting seriously.)


	15. Damian fails at flirting at Colin

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This started out as an ask from an anon on tumblr and then my mind ran away with it. 21 April 2017

> So, I love the idea of Damian being smooth with Colin, but every time I picture him trying to compliment Colin, I feel like he's like. " Colin, I- You should know-You fight good" (Like from Mulan??)

OMG YES. Extremely awkward Damian ftw!

I’m sure that over time he would probably get better with his attempted flirts, but early on Colin was probably treated to such gems as:

  * “You’re not that… you’re good. You’re good company.”
  * “You have the– you don’t– stop staring at me.”
  * “I AM PERFECTLY CAPABLE OF MAKING SENSE.”
  * “Do you– the manor– that is… um… Do you want to stay? Not here. There. The manor. _Are you coming over or not?!_”
  * “I like you. _Being_ with you I mean. NOT LIKE THAT. _Damn it Wilkes stop laughing!_”
  * “You’re not annoying. I like being around you.”  
“Are you saying you like me?”  
“That’s not- no- you’re not– *aggravated sigh and a few choice words in Arabic*”  
“…Did you just say you love me?”  
“I did _not_ say ouhibbouka!”  
“Oh so that’s how you say it in Arabic. Now I’ll know when you say it.”  
“_Damn it Wilkes!_“
__
  * “You’re going to– NO. Not with the face and the eyes and the– NO. STOP. You’re going to– Wilkes, you are _going_ to make my older brother start shrieking about you being obscenely adorable. Please stop before you incite an aneurysm!”  
“You think I’m adorable?”  
“Y-_NO_. Absolutely not!”  
“Awwww, you think I’m cute.”  
“…I am going to sacrifice your kidneys.”  
“My ‘cute’ kidneys?”  
“…I am not even going to get into whether it is possible for internal organs to be ‘cute’. And it’s not.”  
“But you think I’m cute.”  
“I didn’t-! …I can’t even look at your face right now.”  
“…My ‘cute’ face?”  
“GGGAAAAAHHHH!!!!”
  * “If that wound scars I’m going to butcher Cinderblock’s face.”
  * “You’re good at that. Lifting the- the thing… I… shut up.”
  * “If you died, I’d– you– YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO DIE.”  
“…Everyone dies eventually?”  
“NO. YOU’RE NOT ALLOWED.”  
“But-”  
“_Lazarus pit!_”
  * “I am being forced to go to my school’s prom and you are going with me! YOU ARE NOT LEAVING ME ALONE WITH THESE PEONS WILKES.”  
“…Did you just ask me out on a date? To your _prom_?”  
“If a date is sparing me from suffering by being surrounded by idiots alone, then yes.”  
”That’s actually kind of romantic and sweet.”  
”This isn’t about being romantic Wilkes! This is about keeping me from killing people by letting me see your face– stop looking at me like that!”
  * “I need you to publicly date me so I can tell the paparazzi to go to hell.”  
“Sooo, in other words you want to take our relationship public.”  
“This is about the paparazzi.”  
“Riiiiight. Because you’re totally dating me for convenience.”  
“I do not ‘date for convenience’. This is business.”  
“Right. Like the business of trying to talk me into moving in.”  
“MOVING IN IS FOR YOUR OWN GOOD. GOLIATH AGREES.”  
“…Are you using Goliath as an excuse to _propose_ to me?”  
“NO… MAYBE.”  
“We’re freaking _18_. That’s just… WOW.”  
“I am not proposing to you because of the paparazzi! I’m proposing your face- NO. I’m asking you– this is just– Wilkes, will you publicly date me or not?”  
“That made no sense.”  
“Face the paparazzi with me and suffer my pain.”  
“You’re so weird.”

__

I’m sure there could easily be more, but I’m pretty sure this already got a little out of hand. XD

__


	16. Devilfish and Bluepulse OT3 relationship headcanons

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was an ask meme that, when my friend Tam asked if I would do either/or, I immediately decided to do both because _hell yes, two of my ships_. 20 July 2017

> coredesignixandnekonee asked:
> 
> Can I ask for all ten (or just all of the sleep related) prompts from the otp important questions list for devilfish and/or Bluepulse OT3?

#  **Devilfish**

**1) Who falls asleep on the other and has to be carried to bed?** Eddie’s the one more likely to fall asleep on La’gaan and then get carried to bed. While Eddie _can_ carry La’gaan if he has to, if La’gaan falls asleep on him he’s much more likely to just stay put and eventually nod off himself. (Yes, this has led to the two of them sleeping on the couch tangled with each other.)

**2) Who goes to sleep at a normal time and who loves to stay up late?** La’gaan’s more likely to head to bed at a ‘normal time’/earlier and Eddie’s got a habit of staying up late. Part of it is that La’gaan can’t help but wake up WAY early out of long-held habit, so if he wants a decent amount of sleep he has to crash earlier. The other part of it is that Eddie’s used to weird sleeping hours due to doing the heroing thing since he was _twelve_ (plus staying up late regularly due to being caught up in what he’s doing).

**3) Who slips into bed at two in the morning and immediately gets wrapped in a hug and not let go.** Eddie’s the one more likely to slip into bed late, and La’gaan absolutely will wrap him up in a hug. Sometimes he’ll even wrap a leg around Eddie while he’s at it, just to make sure Eddie will stay in bed. (Eddie loves it.)

**4) How does your OTP sleep? What position(s) are the comfiest?** They vary. Sometimes it’s spooning, sometimes it’s Eddie curled up to La’gaan’s side or the other way around, sometimes they’re face to face, and sometimes they’re side-by-side and almost holding hands. However they’re laying, it’s pretty much guaranteed that Eddie’s tail will be wrapped around either one of La’gaan’s ankles or legs, or one of his wrists.

**5) Who wakes up during a thunderstorm?** La’gaan is more of the lighter sleeper, so he’d be more likely to wake up than Eddie.

**6) Who wakes the other up so they can be wrapped up in a hug again?** EDDIE. True, La’gaan might gently tug Eddie closer, but Eddie would definitely appreciate a somewhat awake La’gaan hugging him a little more tightly before settling back to sleep.

**7) Who sneaks out to get a midnight snack?** Eddie. However, if La’gaan got up to go eat in the middle of the night then Eddie would follow him soon after to keep him company.

**8) Who starts flipping out because oh my god someone’s in the kitchen? What do they do? ((Bonus points if they end up hurting the other person and have to patch them up from a defense attack))** LA’GAAN. If no one was supposed to be there then he would immediately be PISSED that someone broke in, and the moment he jerks up out of bed Eddie would snap awake and would go with him. The only thing that would keep the person from getting their ass kicked is the fact that the glow from Eddie’s eyes would make it easy to see exactly who the other person is. If it was someone they knew, then it would lead to a full-blown rant from La’gaan; if not, then that person would sent packing in very short order.

**9) Do they sit in the living room and start a movie and eat snacks or go back to bed and cuddle back to sleep.** Both of them would be kind of wired, so they might stay up for a bit before eventually heading back to bed.

**10) Who wakes up first and starts coffee/breakfast and who lays in bed as long as possible to grumble and complain?** La’gaan would wake up first and get coffee (for Eddie) and tea (for himself) started, and Eddie would eventually come drifting out of bed to get breakfast started. As far as laying in bed and grumbling about getting up, both of them are guilty of it at times; on those days it takes them a while to get out of bed.

#  **Bluepulse OT3**

**1) Who falls asleep on the other and has to be carried to bed?** BART. The order of who’s most likely to fall asleep on the others goes Bart-Jaime-Khaji Da. If Khaji Da falls asleep most aren’t going to notice. If Jaime falls asleep then it’s a toss-up of whether Bart would carry him to bed or try to snuggle with him wherever they are, assuming that Khaji Da is willing to accept staying put and doesn’t pull the whole thing of, “This is not an acceptable place to sleep.” With Bart though, if he falls asleep on them he’ll get carried off to bed by Jaime, or Khaji Da, or occasionally both.

**2) Who goes to sleep at a normal time and who loves to stay up late?** Khaji Da is the one who stays up latest (mainly because he requires less sleep). Bart’s sleeping schedule can be all over the place sometimes so he varies on this. Jaime however has the most regular sleeping schedule of the three of them (or at least he tries to), so he’s the least likely to stay up late.

**3) Who slips into bed at two in the morning and immediately gets wrapped in a hug and not let go.** This one varies, but however it plays out it usually results in Khaji Da tangling himself around Jaime and Bart.

**4) How does your OTP sleep? What position(s) are the comfiest?** Loooooots of snuggling. Bart particularly likes curling up to Jaime’s back so that he can bury his face between Jaime’s shoulder-blades and against Khaji Da. Whatever their positions, because they do change it up depending on what’s comfortable, it’s not uncommon for the armor to be partially wrapped around Jaime and a tendril or two to be draped over Bart.

**5) Who wakes up during a thunderstorm?** BART. Too many bad memories and a past where loud noises usually meant bad news. Fortunately he can snuggle close to Jaime and Khaji Da and settle back down to sleep.

**6) Who wakes the other up so they can be wrapped up in a hug again?** Baaaart. He will gladly nudge Jaime or Khaji Da awake for another hug or more snuggles. Khaji Da might act annoyed, but he isn’t really. More like a fond exasperation.

**7) Who sneaks out to get a midnight snack?** BART. Not all that surprising either considering his metabolism.

**8) Who starts flipping out because oh my god someone’s in the kitchen? What do they do? ((Bonus points if they end up hurting the other person and have to patch them up from a defense attack))** Khaji Da and Bart. Jaime’s the reasonable one in this equation. If the person didn’t get hurt by Khaji Da stapling them to the wall or Bart body-checking them into the wall it would be a miracle. At least one dish would probably get broken in the process, which would end up with them cleaning up glass or ceramic and possibly having to pull slivers or pieces out of someone’s foot.

**9) Do they sit in the living room and start a movie and eat snacks or go back to bed and cuddle back to sleep.** Jaime and Khaji Da might be tempted to head back to bed, but Bart would still be wired, so Jaime and Khaji Da would stay up with Bart.

**10) Who wakes up first and starts coffee/breakfast and who lays in bed as long as possible to grumble and complain?** It would vary between Jaime and Khaji Da who woke up first (usually it’s Jaime making the coffee and then fading back to let Khaji Da make breakfast), but Bart almost invariably lingers in bed and groans pathetically about getting up until the smell of breakfast pulls him out of bed. Sometimes he tries to cling like a leech to Jaime and Khaji Da to get them to stay in bed longer and will whine at them as they try to detangle themselves.


	17. Notre Amour Incassable (Our Unbreakable Love): A MallahBrain playlist

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was on a MallahBrain kick and, because there's so little content for them, wound up making this. 13 November 2017

##  **Notre Amour Incassable (Our Unbreakable Love):**  
a MallahBrain playlist

  * **Track 1:** Love Story – Indila
  * **Track 2:** Tourner Dans Le Vide – Indila
  * **Track 3:** Dernière Danse – Indila
  * **Track 4:** Boite En Argent – Indila
  * **Track 5:** Le Bien Qui Fait Mal – Mozart: L’Opera Rock
  * **Track 6:** Bad Romance – Lady Gaga
  * **Track 7:** Icarus – Bastille
  * **Track 8:** Laughter Lines – Bastille
  * **Track 9:** The Draw – Bastille
  * **Track 10:** No One’s Here To Sleep – Naughty Boy ft. Bastille
  * **Track 11:** Mini World – Indila
  * **Track 12:** L’assasymphonie – Florent Mothe
  * **Track 13:** Vivre A En Crever – Mozart: L’Opera Rock
  * **Track 14:** J’envoie Valser – Zazie
  * **Track 15:** Je Suis Un Homme – Zazie
  * **Track 16:** Coming Down – Halsey
  * **Track 17:** I Don’t Wanna Miss A Thing: Aerosmith Cover – Dan Vasc
  * **Track 18:** Iris: Goo Goo Dolls Cover – Témi
  * **Track 19:** The Scientist – Coldplay
  * **Track 20:** SAIL – AWOLNation


	18. Batfam Headcanon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yet another example of me seeing a headcanon and my mind running away with it. Also tired Batdad. 18 January 2018

> short-blonde-andaverage:
> 
> headcanon that whenever someone posts a conspiracy article about how Bruce Wayne is abusing his kids someone responds with the comment “no i think they’re all just really reckless” and provides a link to a video of Dick Grayson attempting to back-flip off of a moving car while Damian is driving

“I’ve tried talking to them. I know _I’ve_ done some reckless things, but that doesn’t mean I want my children to!”

“I’m afraid the car is minor compared to some of the things they’ve done. When Dick was 9 he tried to ‘surf’ down the banister of the grand staircase. And a week later he did a backflip off the roof of his school into the pool.”  
(Brief cut to a teacher looking exhausted with the aggravated sigh of “_That_ child…”)

“When Jason was 11 during the middle of the annual charity gala he took a flying leap into the chandelier from the second floor landing and swung around until he deliberately landed in the cake. And yes, I _know_ it was deliberate.”  
(Cut to a picture of Jason the moment he landed in the cake.)

“Tim is the only one that hasn’t made me almost cry from stress, although he came close when he didn’t sleep for four days and was sustaining himself on coffee and after dinner mints.”  
(Picture of a tired Tim with a cup of coffee in hand.)

“Cass decided that using the second floor banister as a balance beam was acceptable.”  
(Picture of the banister looking down toward the floor below. Some fingerprints are just barely visible on the wood.)

“Damian is… He is my youngest, I love him dearly, but he remains convinced that if a vehicle exists then he can drive it. I’m just glad that we’ve been able to keep his driving on Wayne Manor grounds. I’ve had to block his attempts to buy pedal-extensions several times over.”  
(Once again cut to said video mentioned above.)

“Duke once decided to explore the tunnels of Wayne Manor. He came out on top of one of the sets of shelves in the library. I was genuinely terrified that old thing would fall out from under him and that he’d break his neck.”  
(Picture of the end of one of the sets of shelves, ridiculously tall as it is.)

“And Ms. Brown? Your daughter’s friend?”  
“Stephanie is as bad as the rest of them. I think she encourages them.”  
(A picture of Steph wearing sunglasses and a black t-shirt with the words “Deal With It” in white.)


End file.
